From Abla (Helpless) to Ghost
Indian Women will be feared as if they were Ghosts or rather worse than that. Why? Well they are working hard for that status. And hard work pays.
Few days back I saw footage on STAR NEWS of a Husband brutually beaten by wife, dumped in a hidden camera. This was a move of a husband who was harassed by his wife since marriage and what he called a 9-12 pm daily torture. And since he was not believed by anyone he had to resort to this method.
The merciless beating by wife on that human being belonging to gender called man was shown on television where anyone could make out the vengeance on the face of the lady spitting, beating, kicking there, slapping left right, punching, knocking on his head with hers, rallying her feat on his face. Oh my god.
Inspite of all this some years back he said he was falsely charged of section 498A and other standard sections that accompany (later reconciled).
Now, the contradiction.
Few days back I saw footage on STAR NEWS of a Husband brutually beaten by wife, dumped in a hidden camera. This was a move of a husband who was harassed by his wife since marriage and what he called a 9-12 pm daily torture. And since he was not believed by anyone he had to resort to this method.
The merciless beating by wife on that human being belonging to gender called man was shown on television where anyone could make out the vengeance on the face of the lady spitting, beating, kicking there, slapping left right, punching, knocking on his head with hers, rallying her feat on his face. Oh my god.
Inspite of all this some years back he said he was falsely charged of section 498A and other standard sections that accompany (later reconciled).
Now, the contradiction.
After watching the footage...
- The lady lawyer felt it is just one such case and there is no need to protect the males with help of a special law.
- The lady lawyer felt it is just one such case and there is no need to protect the males with help of a special law.
- The psychologist said that, may be, the wife was upset and the 40 hrs footage was not enough to prove her guilty.
- The victimized husband who required sympathy, was instead asked by the host that was that a planned sting operation where since he was conscious he did not react. But I ask wasn’t the fact that he was beaten so mercilessly not enough to realize that he was in trouble?
- Chugh spoke well, but was having nobody supporting him. Instead all the pointers were towards the distorted fact that husband planned a camera, rather than being sympathetic towards that human. All this, adding insult to the injury.
- The wife a typical liar was asked a question that if she was being harassed for dowry? Or was he beating her? She kept mum. Nobody raised the issue that why she forced him to stay separately from his parents. She did pretend to cry, with no tears.
- Police also said that they were handcuffed even to speak against a lady.
Now my question:
- IF the wife filed 498A on the husband and his family in 2003 and that time if only her statement was sufficient (like in all 498A cases) to put the non-compoundable, non-bailable and cognizable, offence. Then WHY the husband’s recording of his wife’s atrocities on camera, much powerful than a statement as evidence is still insufficient as per the law, as the perpetual benefits beyond doubt goes to the merciless wife??????????
Emperor’s New Clothes were once again appreciated by the panel that pretended sleep, leaving the victim and chugh alone.
- Why is the abla status as recognized by law, making women so powerful and man so weak that her statement is enough to harass the whole family where as a live footage of beating by wife to a husband still considered incomplete evidence??????
Well you pretend that you do not understand but those days are not far where certain aakashwani’s would be true.
Swarup says that In very near future guys will not marry any girls and would prefer pre-nuptials or live in relationship or would only hire prostitutes because the law is so biased against males, that the National Highway will witness the decent girls asking for a part time husband.
In other words it means that they will settle for just anybody at any condition as they are fencing themselves so hard today that they will have to give up all their rights in order to be approachable. But people will run away from women as the law has made them so scary like ghosts.
Another powerful statement comes from Bharti who states that the over branding of injustice on females has caused terror in minds of parents and hence female feoticide cases are on rise.
And I feel that with such stand of people on going soft on a culprit who being a female enjoys all the benefits beyond doubts and a male gets kicked because he is a male. Plus the growing rejection of women as wife because of this will lead any women to lead a life dependent on endless conditions to convince that she won’t misuse the law. More and more people will avoid marriage as relationship. With this false wolf cry of women today, the women tomorrow would only loose the respect in the eyes of men and more so female foeticide cases would only rise, as women too would not want their daughters to be feared of and rejected like ghosts.
Sighing,
Jinesh Zaveri.
posted by IndianHusbands | 11:20 PM
38 Comments:
This lawyer and that psychologist are one among the f**ls in our society, in my opinion.
Idiots in our society making the nation to get into the glory of complete ditches.
An youngmMan is heavily required for the development of the compelte infrastructure of the country.
If men are becoming like toys in the society and mitigated fools existing here and there certainly make india further poor and poverty ridden. Alas! God save this country/
Hi Jinesh
Sting operations hold no ground.period. They are made-up.
Forget about male or women issues for sometime and recollect that a few months ago...a famous actor was caught very cheaply on tape. Later he justified that the girl was throwing herself on him..so what was he expected to do?? I too as a women support his stand that he did not do anything wrong when a girl was throwing herself willingly!! Majority of the people supported him including women organizations, his own wife , daughter and his own co-stars both male and female. Everyone criticised the channel that stooped to low levels to gain viewership etc.
But point made by everyone was that the girl was very much aware of what was happening(or recording shall we say??) therefore the whole episode was baised and inapporpriate. Not a 'natural event or action'.
Similarly no normal humanbeing (for that matter) especially the stronger sex ie MAN would take any beating for 40 hrs without reacting...it was made up to trap the wife. Not to forget to self-defend himself!! but no nothing.
Many law cases have failed becasue 'trap' does not hold weightage in the courtroom as eveidence. You may ask your lawyer's expert advise. Basically its common sense that the person who is laying the trap(as in recording in this situation) was not reacting normally ie he created the situation and no self-defence purposely.
Just as u saw it and state...even the males are not going to support or symapathize with him coz his reaction was a must and the most normal action expected was ie to beat back his wife or if nothing else rescue himself. Even a MAD person when beaten defends himself. Self-defence is not a crime.
None will support this.
More concrete evidence is required.
As simple as catching the women red-handed live.
In anycase a well written article with regard to the 'proof required point of view, biased opinion'
BUT the last statement is shocking and sooooo INSENSITIVE. Please remove it.
Must I say that from where did Bharat conclude that female feoticide is becasue ppl are scared to bring up a girl child, feared of or considered ghosts!! May I know what his derivation process was??
A baby girl is killed only for only ONE reason ie her parents cannot afford to pay her future DOWRY. They think of her to be a burden...yes...definately...what with the sorry state of villages where the girls parents hv to pay dowry even today. Pls quote one such parent from the village who says that the only reason they killed their baby girl--coz she is a threat to man, to be feared or Ghost or whatever u have stated above!
No...they only say baby girl is a 'burden coz of dowry'.
I have personally been to villages when i was in my teens as part of my convent school project, and seen where a girl child is killed coz parents feared/anticipated future dowry demands from MEN. This is what their murderous mothers/fathers said or admitted . This is the sole reason only. How ignorant can one be of facts!!
Even as a mere teenager I argued with those parents saying 'so dont get your daughters married -no dowry issue then'. Murder of an innocent new-born cannot be ever JUSTIFIED. Period.
I agree that many of you feel ur wives have been cruel by using 498a...but please do not put the blame on new-born-girls. Or mix up 2 things. A fact has to be faced and admitted that female feoticide occurs only for 1 reason ie..Anticipating Failure to pay Future Dowry by her parents.
DOWRY yet exists in rural India.
Kindly do not mix 2 issues.
1) FEAR of failure to pay dowry in future/burden is one thing which leads to murder of an innocent girl.
2) False 498a is another thing.
Jinesh I dont know if u have kids or no..but am sure u must be having nieces, sisters..are you going to see them as ghosts too or FEAR them?? One one side your group shouts that 'pregnant women' are thrown to jail, have mercy, remove 498a etc etc and on the other side you have your saddistic view on 'female feoticide reason'.
What a contradiction??
I would yet really like to know from where you derived that "over-branding....etc etc..is compelling parents to kill their girls".
Did I misunderstand or what?
Jinesh I have been reading the posts on your site for months, never did I come across as something so insensitive.
I had no issues with sting operation comments u have stated of a man beaten.
BUT in the latter comment of urs I am appalled to read your saddistic point of view on the ''reason'' for female feoticide.
Female feoticide cannot be JUSTIFIED. Its a hard core cold blooded murder.
Regards
Dear Anonymous Friend.
Thanks once again. Will write in details a little later Today. Need to rush for work as of now.
Meanwhile, to avoid the discussion to go on a wrong track let me clarify as of now that Neither Bharti or Swarup talked about Ghosts status.
Other thing about the harassed Guy, he did defend himself everytime and did react to her punches too as he must when attacked so brutually, once resorted to calling neighbors for help but the wife cleverly started to cry and blamed the husband. but more comments when I find time to write.
I have started to like discussing with you. Will definately write more. and to all your points.
Cheers and have a nice time.
Can you tell me about yourself? what is the harm in that?
Else I will give you a name. :D
Looking forward to great discussions.
I think you have highlighted a very crucial point here. With the help of the bogus claims and false pretence, feminists have created an environment in which people refuse to believe 'live' atrocities on men by women. Yet they are willing to believe in the false stories by the women about female harassment.
- Satya
Master rebel
Don’t get so rebellious……
1)First tell me when did I call this eye-opening blog insensitive? Never
I quote myself “BUT the ‘last statement’ is shocking and sooooo INSENSITIVE andJinesh I have been reading the posts on your site for months, never did I come across as something so insensitive.”’ Unquote. This means I was refering ONLY to that particular statement of jinesh. If you see or understand any sentence in my comments that makes you belief I have termed this entire blog as insensitive, do quote me then ….. I await. Though u cannot for a mere reason coz I have NOT said it.
Therefore do not throw false accusations around and deviate from the point by quoting “- calling this eye-opening blog as insensitive and calling the whole episode of wife beating her husband as made-up. “---your quote.
2) Exlain to me what is female foeticide according to you? The real facts?
I am pasting a link below. Tell me how different this is from my views when even I call it murder and nothing else.
Rebel you quoted “I could have told you the real facts of female foeticide but after second thought, I feel, "Nah, you are not worth anything".
I want to know ‘ your real facts’. Read the link below and I hope it gives u info which is explained in simple english. Maybe it may give you an insight to the actual reality .
Also the link is a website of a very reputed international organization , its understanding and its survey on female foeticide.(Not some dumb scientist who studies logic ratios of man and woman) .
http://www.indianchild.com/abortion_infanticide_foeticide_india.htm
3) While commenting to the first part of Jinesh’s article, I only answered his question ie his quote “ Now my question: - IF the wife filed on the …….”
I simply said that recorded evidence if done deliberately is not accepted as per the law(ofcourse the jugde can have his own discretion). My view was purely legal. Also I added said that one can further ask the expert advise of the lawyer. As they would know best.
Yes and most impt I have deliberarely chosen not to comment on whether the beating was right or wrong …for obvious reasons as I want to refrain from moral opinions.
Anyway ,it was Jinesh’s point of view and let him solely decide what he feels appropriate.
4) I stated that I went to a village as part of my school project…does not mean recently. . You said you were a ‘big boy and I should be scared’….I misunderstood. I was assuming you were a ‘matured man’…am wrong , you’re a big boy. Nevertheless it reminds me of my good old college days and how young boys would boast then…well.
Anyway read the link and decide. It will make you happy as you have said that you ‘wish’ when crimes increase on women more and more. Look at the larger picture rather than childishly picking on petty things and name-calling.
No one is stopping you from forming a NCM. Not me..no one. You asked me why men cant have a special cell NCM!! Yes definetely I believe in equality and you guys too should have an organizsed and legal forum. Maybe then it will curb violence.
Byw Bharati….abortion or infacticide….the intention is cruel and end result is the same. I agree.
Regards
Rebel
Do not worry I will not loose my sleep and can read well.
You may say whatver you want about anything..it harldy matters.
Reading others views makes anyone more knowledgeable --if nothing else.
Yes you are right on one aspect that I wont believe any reason "on why innocent helpless babies are killed" so...that answers it.
As for only women victims making it to the news and headlines...times will change and are changing...soon stories of men vicitms will also make it to the news...like the one one star TV. So chill.
I am yet waiting for you to quote me from my first comment when did I call this entire blog as per your false accusation 'insensitive'. Do point it out.
Regards
Dear Anonymous Friend,
My replies in Square Brackets
Sting operations hold no ground.period.
[True, But they have in so many cases in India. It started from tehelka and the recent one is the sex scandal. So why not this? Just because it is against women?]
Forget about male or women issues for sometime and recollect that a few months ago...a famous actor was caught very cheaply on tape. Later he justified that the girl was throwing herself on him..so what was he expected to do?? I too as a women support his stand that he did not do anything wrong when a girl was throwing herself willingly!! Majority of the people supported him including women organizations, his own wife , daughter and his own co-stars both male and female. Everyone criticised the channel that stooped to low levels to gain viewership etc.
But point made by everyone was that the girl was very much aware of what was happening(or recording shall we say??) therefore the whole episode was baised and inapporpriate. Not a 'natural event or action'.
[That issue I can agree whatever was being heard but when seen I cannot support that man a bit and I do not care for majority I care for truth. I have never supported him as he insisted the girl to meet him. With Regards to his wife supporting him well I have recognized these as may be case 3 Sita or case 2 Surpanakha & Rakshash. (read my 1st article Sita Surpanakha) and still that does not make that man innocent. Similarly if the whole world appreciates the clothes of naked emperor that does not become the truth. And you require a ‘BOY’ to recognizes and atones the fact that emperor is infact Naked.
I understand what you want to say from argument point of view. But you should understand that I am talking on a different platter. It is not compulsory that you have to misinterpret if there is a scope, thought the truth is evident. We all agree that the actor could have behaved better, like Rahul Dravid in MTV bakra unaware of the silly sting, ran out of the room where the girl was proposing him to marry her. Bharti too have very clearly asked that same question, that let us concentrate on what is important.]
Similarly no normal humanbeing (for that matter) especially the stronger sex ie MAN would take any beating for 40 hrs without reacting...it was made up to trap the wife. Not to forget to self-defend himself!! but no nothing.
Many law cases have failed becasue 'trap' does not hold weightage in the courtroom as eveidence. You may ask your lawyer's expert advise. Basically its common sense that the person who is laying the trap(as in recording in this situation) was not reacting normally ie he created the situation and no self-defence purposely.
[All I wanted to say was why we get so blind that we do not see the beating done by wife. Please suggest what should that guy do when no one is listening to him. again stronger sex is always a "yeda ban ke peda khana stunt."
And most importantly my question was on the credibility and safety of 498A that does not even require a panel, a show, a sting operation at all to jail all those listed. (God Forbid) Hypothesis: In other words if your bhabhi in India decides to include your name in the disgrace list even if you are abroad, she won’t require any proof of the lie that she would tell the police and you would be charged under Non- Compoundable, Non-Bailable and cognizable offence that may include you innocent parents and your camera sting operation won't work either but her statement would be good enough for the police to get you all arrested(God Forbid). Just tell me is that justified by any angle? As this defeats the fundamental concept of the legal jurisprudence that thousand guilty men may escape the clutches of law but one innocent man should not get punished for a crime he has never committed. We are fighting against this.]
A baby girl is killed only for only ONE reason ie her parents cannot afford to pay her future DOWRY. They think of her to be a burden...yes...definately...what with the sorry state of villages where the girls parents hv to pay dowry even today. Pls quote one such parent from the village who says that the only reason they killed their baby girl--coz she is a threat to man, to be feared or Ghost or whatever u have stated above!
No...they only say baby girl is a 'burden coz of dowry'.
[Those parents fooled you. Over Branding is happening everywhere and all that I mentioned was *I feel* tomorrow that foeticide would continue as the law will make women so scary that its misuse will make anyone fear them as if they were ghosts.
As far as dowry is concerned we all condemn it. There is a wonderful law that takes care of it. But we are wondering why this wonderful law is incomplete that gives opportunity to crooks to encash.]
I have personally been to villages when i was in my teens as part of my convent school project, and seen where a girl child is killed coz parents feared/anticipated future dowry demands from MEN. This is what their murderous mothers/fathers said or admitted. This is the sole reason only. How ignorant can one be of facts!!
[I will tell you how ignorant we are. They told you and you agreed on their face value. Do you think they are sensible and not liars? I will tell you a fact. Those villager parents do not hesitate to have a male child, so that they can send him to a metro when he is hardly 7 or 8 yrs old to a canteen to serve tea (tambi) or to polish shoes on station and then attend a night school. These tambi guys just get food twice that’s all and 2 pairs of clothes the money that they get goes to the parents directly from the canteen owner. Don’t expect them to tell you this truth.
How can you even fight for such murderer parents who falsely justify by such crooked reason taking the whole nation for ride?
I have interacted with the jawans who wait for wars and say that if they are injured their family will get so much of amount if they are dead they get their families so much of amount. So, that psyche also exists. Please now for heavens sake do not mis-interpret this.]
Even as a mere teenager I argued with those parents saying 'so dont get your daughters married -no dowry issue then'. Murder of an innocent new-born cannot be ever JUSTIFIED. Period.
[Shaabhash, I am with you even today. I will adopt them, No boasting. My dear friend unfortunately you have committed haste in concluding my stand.]
I agree that many of you feel ur wives have been cruel by using 498a...but please do not put the blame on new-born-girls. Or mix up 2 things. A fact has to be faced and admitted that female feoticide occurs only for 1 reason ie..Anticipating Failure to pay Future Dowry by her parents.
[I have told you why those saddist villagers want male child. So please do not mix up the two issues. The reasons they give are not to be trusted. Because if they were to be killed where did our mothers and grand mothers come from? These feminist have cleverly misbranded and magnified the whole issue and one day this false wolf cry will take its toll.]
DOWRY yet exists in rural India.
[SOWRY exists in Urban India. In other words Misuse of Dowry law exists in urban India.
Get me one such family that is demanding dowry from the wife I swear our full team will come with chappals to beat them up. Myself a Jaini and Gandhian will too break this rule for a change. ]
Jinesh I dont know if u have kids or no..but am sure u must be having nieces, sisters..are you going to see them as ghosts too or FEAR them??
[I have nieces very lovely and sensible. I love them and hence I am worried about their status. They are telling right now that they are with me and they love me as much I do, with this attitude of theirs they will be the most wanted of bahus in my circle who strongly condemn the misuse of 498A]
One one side your group shouts that 'pregnant women' are thrown to jail, have mercy, remove 498a etc etc and on the other side you have your saddistic view on 'female feoticide reason'.
[“Pause” You are on verge of a gross misinterpretation and Now I have all the right to be annoyed. Please read my article once again, Tell me where have I JUSTIFIED this?]
What a contradiction??
[Where?]
I had no issues with sting operation comments u have stated of a man beaten.
BUT in the latter comment of urs I am appalled to read your saddistic point of view on the ''reason'' for female feoticide.
[Hey let me shrug you. Now this is getting too much. You are mixing it up all, read again]
Female feoticide cannot be JUSTIFIED. Its a hard core cold blooded murder.
[Who the hell is justifying? will to tell me where? I am just talking about the apprehension (that my daughter- if I am privileged to have one) might face. On a cold blooded murder yes it is.
My stand was to say that Just like those ancestors did all the atrocities on a caste and their dissendents of the open category are split wide open today suffering grossly as a result.
Please tell me where I am justifying your perception of saddist and insensible comment? All I was telling was wake up before it is too late else that saddist act would be the unfortunate option, and i am putting all these efforts because I know pen is mightier than sword, that will help open the eyes of people who are being easily mislead with wrong branding and false statistics]
[BTW I am highly indebted by your interest in my blog and articles. My sincere thanks, and I expect this to be a healthy debate with some fruitful conclusion]
Precisely Rebel....
I will keep waiting....how i love it when u fail to quote one.The wait is worth it.
Byw whoever said that quoting and unquoting is girlish.
Read above other comments with open eyes.
regards
anonymous. don't think that by raising the issue of female foeticide, you can cover up the incidents of men been tortured by wife. i completely agree with jinesh, he has pointed out important issues that maybe nobody would have considered before. as for rebel, he seem to be a little aggressive, maybe because he knows the situation better than you.
i believe you should get yourself equipped with exact facts and only then comment. i have read your comments too and i didnt find any truth in that. female foeticide is an economic issue and not a gender issue, understand that well. you being a woman, its natural you would support another woman even if she is wrong or a criminal. its your choice but i know that a lot many men are realising that women should not be protected at all as they are misusing laws for their selfish ends. i believe that if a woman does not support a male victim, then she should be considered a enemy of truth.
good blog jinesh.
Jinesh,
I don't believe that this is an isolated or exceptional incident. For that matter, foreign countries have conducted a survey where women beat up their husband 35% more than husband beating their wife. Therefore, husband getting beaten up by his wife can't be considered rared at all. The problem is that the Indian society has considered physical strength not as a capability, but as a duty and responsibility towards women who are falsely considered as weaker sex. That is why men don't feel comfortable coming out in the open with their complaint because society will never believe him. This man presented the video tape and still nobody wants to believe him. This itself shows how men are suffering from this sex discrimination in the society since ages and still it is continuing. Cops too can't do anything because there is no such law that would punish the woman and thats enough for any sane person to understand that men are becoming the weaker sex. I request all men to think seriously on this issue because if it can happen to others, it can happen to you too or at least someone within your family. Don't keep quiet on this issue because we are fighting for our rights and its not related to our physical strength. Its about justice and we want it.
Bharti,
I agree with you that female foeticide is not an gender issue, its an economic issue. But these women organisations are trying to show that men are responsible for all this only beacuse they want to control all men legally by demanding legal provisions to give a woman to accuse any man of anything. Too much importance given to women will only ruin the society. This isn't gender equality. These women wants to invade men's rights under the label of gender equality. We must not allow them to do it.
My personal feeling says that women will be in power for only two years. Then people will realise how women are in reality. People will begin to realise that women should not be protected, should not be respected, and should not be given extraordinary rights because they are women. Study shows that women physically hurt their children more than the father. That itself shows that women of today have no heart at all. Men too are realising that behind a woman's beautiful body and face, there is a sinister and savage intentions going on in a woman's mind.
Hi Jinesh
Yes whether it is tehelka or any other sex scandal where channels promote themselves. This one too made the headlines….and got coverage. Once again I say it lies upto the judge and his discretion. I speak from my own personal exp even after having evidence…a lot of evidence….there is every possibility that the culprit may get away. I have been told this by many people –that I should expect the worst judgement. It has nothing to do with women beating man or vice versa. I was solely answering your question in the article as to why this can’t be taken as evidence?
But you see I don’t care about what majority says or thinks or the opponents can pull a victim down….coz majority is not always right. Truth will prevail. We have history to prove that most leaders when started were all alone and yet made it.
Yes I agree that the actor could have behaved…BUT as I said I was not commenting on moral issues…coz these actors live in another world altogether. God bless that wife who supported her husband..really!!!!!!!!!
Quote…All I wanted to say was why we get so blind that we do not see the beating done by wife. Please suggest what should that guy do when no one is listening to him. again stronger sex is always a "yeda ban ke peda khana stunt."…unquote
I condemn any type of domestic violence…we don’t talk of human beings then…these people are monsters if they think beating and killing solve any purpose. This comes from a victim herself. But indulging in violence is the order of the day these days looks like. Only the one who is weak indulges in violence…..I stick by that stongly.
Quote And most importantly my question was on the credibility and safety of 498A that does not even require a panel, a show, a sting operation at all to jail all those listed. Unquote
Ya I already know that…498a does not require any investigaion. No sting required nothing. Thts why so many blogs by men and women…who are either promoting it or condemning it….in anycase its advertisement taking place left right center
I know the reason why male children are not killed…the parents have not fooled me. I thought you would give me the ‘benefit of the doubt’ ie I am already aware that young boys as children are sent to earn money MONEYetc as you have sited some egs. That is child labour-which again is a pathetic state. Yes exactly they “ do not hesitate to have a male child” coz he brings income whn he is a child and when he is big he gets through him they get dowry. Yes those parents are murderous as well greedy coz they serve their own needs. . I am not being baised towards boys…..not at all...atleast they live and not killed. Now when I visit orphanages that are at the far end of central suburbs of mumbai…my seniors yet rescue children ie babies irrespective of gender….ya most of the times its a girl. The reasons for dumping a girl child were always the same. Even baby boys are rescused and are put up for adoption or sent to school and not to work.
And yes our mothers and grandmothers came from those people who think girl or boy…both are equal…after all not all humans think the same.
The description of the female foeticide is actually an allegory to protect the true reason why males are preferred!!!! From there stems dowry from there stems other issues….its a vicious circle!!!!!!!!!
Yes ..now when am having a child. How I pray its not a female but a son. Yes a Son. You see how favourbly baised I am towards boys. This comes from a person who was asked dowry all the time…in an urban city…u know which one…guess.
Therefore your quote Get me one such family that is demanding dowry from the wife I swear our full team will come with chappals to beat them up. Myself a Jaini and Gandhian will too break this rule for a change. unquote
Don’t say that…coz I too use to make hi-fi statements when I was young…but life had something else in store for me….taught me a few lessons. One such statement I use to say that in urban cities dowry does not exist etc etc….but how foolish I was. Therefore today I want a son….coz his life is going to be much easier. No dowry demanding, no breakup and no divorce---wherein both partners are loosers and only loosers.
I don’t want violence…otherwise what will be the difference between me and my husband. Humare yaha ek kahawat hai. “Bhagwan ke ghar der hai, ander nahi, aur uski laathi ki awaaz sunaai nahi deti”. So moral justice will prevail at any cost. Law of KARMA will win as always.
I too expected this to be a healthy debate like you. I hope you have not believed that I have termed your entire blog insensitive. And you don’t have to be indebted when I read your articles. Its fine.
Regards
Hi Jinesh
Yes whether it is tehelka or any other sex scandal where channels promote themselves. This one too made the headlines….and got coverage. Once again I say it lies upto the judge and his discretion. I speak from my own personal exp even after having evidence…a lot of evidence….there is every possibility that the culprit may get away. I have been told this by many people –that I should expect the worst judgement. It has nothing to do with women beating man or vice versa. I was solely answering your question in the article as to why this can’t be taken as evidence?
But you see I don’t care about what majority says or thinks or the opponents can pull a victim down….coz majority is not always right. Truth will prevail. We have history to prove that most leaders when started were all alone and yet made it.
Yes I agree that the actor could have behaved…BUT as I said I was not commenting on moral issues…coz these actors live in another world altogether. God bless that wife who supported her husband..really!!!!!!!!!
Quote…All I wanted to say was why we get so blind that we do not see the beating done by wife. Please suggest what should that guy do when no one is listening to him. again stronger sex is always a "yeda ban ke peda khana stunt."…unquote
I condemn any type of domestic violence…we don’t talk of human beings then…these people are monsters if they think beating and killing solve any purpose. This comes from a victim herself. But indulging in violence is the order of the day these days looks like. Only the one who is weak indulges in violence…..I stick by that stongly.
Quote And most importantly my question was on the credibility and safety of 498A that does not even require a panel, a show, a sting operation at all to jail all those listed. Unquote
Ya I already know that…498a does not require any investigaion. No sting required nothing. Thts why so many blogs by men and women…who are either promoting it or condemning it….in anycase its advertisement taking place left right center
I know the reason why male children are not killed…the parents have not fooled me. I thought you would give me the ‘benefit of the doubt’ ie I am already aware that young boys as children are sent to earn money MONEYetc as you have sited some egs. That is child labour-which again is a pathetic state. Yes exactly they “ do not hesitate to have a male child” coz he brings income whn he is a child and when he is big he gets through him they get dowry. Yes those parents are murderous as well greedy coz they serve their own needs. . I am not being baised towards boys…..not at all...atleast they live and not killed. Now when I visit orphanages that are at the far end of central suburbs of mumbai…my seniors yet rescue children ie babies irrespective of gender….ya most of the times its a girl. The reasons for dumping a girl child were always the same. Even baby boys are rescused and are put up for adoption or sent to school and not to work.
And yes our mothers and grandmothers came from those people who think girl or boy…both are equal…after all not all humans think the same.
The description of the female foeticide is actually an allegory to protect the true reason why males are preferred!!!! From there stems dowry from there stems other issues….its a vicious circle!!!!!!!!!
Yes ..now when am having a child. How I pray its not a female but a son. Yes a Son. You see how favourbly baised I am towards boys. This comes from a person who was asked dowry all the time…in an urban city…u know which one…guess.
Therefore your quote Get me one such family that is demanding dowry from the wife I swear our full team will come with chappals to beat them up. Myself a Jaini and Gandhian will too break this rule for a change. unquote
Don’t say that…coz I too use to make hi-fi statements when I was young…but life had something else in store for me….taught me a few lessons. One such statement I use to say that in urban cities dowry does not exist etc etc….but how foolish I was. Therefore today I want a son….coz his life is going to be much easier. No dowry demanding, no breakup and no divorce---wherein both partners are loosers and only loosers.
I don’t want violence…otherwise what will be the difference between me and my husband. Humare yaha ek kahawat hai. “Bhagwan ke ghar der hai, ander nahi, aur uski laathi ki awaaz sunaai nahi deti”. So moral justice will prevail at any cost. Law of KARMA will win as always.
I too expected this to be a healthy debate like you. I hope you have not believed that I have termed your entire blog insensitive. And you don’t have to be indebted when I read your articles. Its fine.
Regards
My suggestion your latter comment to me was better clarifying and was complete as in quote “My stand was to say that Just like those ancestors did all the atrocities on a caste and their dissendents of the opencategory are split wide open today suffering grossly as a result.
All I was telling was wake up before it is too late else that saddist act would be the unfortunate option, and i am putting all these efforts because I know pen is mightier than sword, that will help open the eyes of people who are being easily mislead with wrong branding and false statistics” unquote
Why don’t you add this part in the article above….which will make it more clear for someone who is visiting this blog and only IF reads this article in ISOLATION. The reason I say this it makes your view clear.
Specially to Anon,
an interesting take on female foeticide. go thru' the link http://people.indiatimes.com/quickiearticleshow/1373948.cms .
My question to you is, has anyone cracked the reason for female foeticide as yet ? By claiming that only reason for female foeticide (FF) is dowry..will it become the truth. Just go thru' the link...it raises some important questions.......Did we ever think Hepatitis B could also be one of the reasons ?
Did you know that FF is more common amongst educated .. don't tell me they are killing because of dowry. Do you know..south delhi has least newborn girl to boy ratio. Of all the places, do you want me to believe south delhi families are actively involved in
FF because of dowry.
Reasons for missing girls requires an honest and indepth study (though, I seriously doubt the figure of 10 million missing girls over last 20 years as it amounts to approximately 4% of newborn girls are killed before they are born...which is ridiculous..a simple sanity check), the next step should be to find out the reasons rather than indulge in senseless bashing.
Please spare us the Feminist propagandas. I won't be surprised..if these feminists are someway responsible for missing girls.
Wasif
woman anonymous,
You know crap about female foeticide. Supposing you are poor earning just over Rs.2000/- per month and you are going to have a child. You are surely going to wish a male child because he will be able to earn on his own from the age of 8 years old or even earlier. Therefore, he will bring in extra income within the family. If you get a girl child who is relatively physically weaker, which is a prequisite in labour jobs, she will act as a economic burden on the family even if they know that there is no certainty that the daughter will survive till her marriage. Till her marriage, for around 18 years old, for 18 years she will not be able to earn any income for the family. Now let us calculate over here. Her expenses would be around Rs. 500/- minimum per month and the family's income is only Rs.2000/-. If a male child is there, he is capable not only to manage his own expenses of Rs.500/-per month but also will add income in the family which could add upto Rs. 2000+1000 = Rs.3000 per month. Looking at the numbers you can figure out that the expenses that the family has to bear for 18 years is approx Rs. 200,000. The family don't even have an investment of Rs.10/- then from where will they bring Rs. 200,000 ? Its not a gender biased decisions, its an economic decision made by the family to abort a girl child. Understood ? Explaining you this basic fact does not mean that I am not against female foeticide. But, you and other people blaming on men for female foeticide will not be tolerated at any cost. This economics will not come out in the open because women organisation want to accuse men for this and not the poverty of India. Dowry comes much later (if at all its exists) in the life of a girl but till she gets to a marriageble age; who is going to provide her she being a non-earner of the family ? Its an economic decision to safeguard all the family. You can call it a murder but mature people will not call it that. Its poverty that is killing female child and not men. Understood. If you have any doubts, read the blog that is presented by Rebel in his comment, I read it and I found it most appropriate and practical and realistic.
You believe that you would prefer a son and not a girl child. Probably you must be knowing that your daughter-in-law can send you to jail with one false complaint under 498a. What are you going to do then ? Think deeper before you write anything.
To anonymous,
You quoted "coz majority is not always right".
My dear friend, think, think, think and only then write. You came to a conclusion that female foeticide is a gender issue only when you heard from few NGOs. Why don't you reason them and refute their claims ? Why don't you tell them, 'majority is not always right' ? Or maybe you are not gutsy enough to tell them because you being a woman would find it convenient to blame it on men even if you know your conclusion is wrong. Now I know why that angry man Rebel has been posting rude remarks on you. You don't seem to understand a thing at all. I doubt you are even educated or illiterate. Growth up kid.....
Prakash
To Prakash
You aren't tell us anything new. We all know that these NGOs who claim to be into social welfare are all minting money and enjoying socialising with people, rich and famous. And the statistics that they prepare are so questionable, even if the Government supports their claim, the general public knows that that is all bullshit. NGO is yet another political party who doesn't win election. There is no other difference. I strongly believe that wife beating her husband is quite common but I must appreciate this man's courage to bring it out in the open. But still people don't want to believe it. as far as 498A is concerned, its a international money-making racket in the society.
Hey Anonymous Friend,
Yes, Undoubtedly You have all the benefit of doubt.
But you need to give that in order to get it back.
Further to your sporting suggestion on including the statement that I used for correlation and better understanding to your comment. Well I appreciate and take a note of it.
But, again!!! If the article is read thoroughly then I am sure the chances of misunderstanding my point of view is zero. Since the meaning is very evident and clear.
Cheers and Thanks!!!
To Jinesh,
I don't know why that woman is not arrested, that man has got visual proof that she has been physically torturing him for so many years. If the cops are saying that there isn't any law that would allow them to arrest that woman, then why don't the Government make necessary amendments in laws so that men too can get equal legal protection ? Me being a woman, I too feel that woman do have the ability to ruin a man's life. But, the society has given a permemant label of weaker sex, that is why people find it hard to believe that a woman can do such a thing. These women who are exploiting their own rights, misusing laws and taking advantage of the society's sentiments should be arrested and punished so that no other woman can do such a crime again.
Prachi
It is really sad to see that a man is giving all the proof but still nobody is ready to believe him. What the Government would have done if it was a wife who was beaten up like this, that man would have been arrested and thrashed in the prison by cops. Why do you think that this is not gender discrimination ? This is not gender equality. Crime and punishment can't be different for male and female. It should be the same for both.
Anand
Dear Prachi and Anand,
Well said.
And that is what I wanted to say in the blog that overfencing laws for women would lead a woman in such a deprived state that people will fear the misuse and run away from a lady just like they run away from ghosts.
Thanks for interpreting it right.
One of you has said that its not a gender issue but an economic issue!! Its the same.
Infact you have even gone to show the income chart of a boy that he can earn from childhood...and the expenses a girl can have etcetc. Even she can go to work and earn..she is not a weaker sex(as u claim)--open ur eyes. It may not be right to generalise girl /women as a weaker sex in terms of the work she can do too. Hellooo...we are on a forum that talks abt equal rights.!!
Her parents cant afford to pay up for her living and dowry??Isnt that gender biased by underestimating her worth which becomes an economic issuse too? But yes...they keep the boys(though make him work mercilessly- pathetic child labour).
Therefore the economic issues leads to gender biased(expected boy to be a potential earner) and evetually killing of the girl(thinking she is a burden-as per your assumption).
Never I have said that 'men' are responsible for killing. So chill. I blame the mother more for this cruel act(no i dont sympathize with her just coz she is poor villager--she can simply put her in the orhpan home and yet give the baby a chance to live).
In my years of visiting the orphanages...my seniors there(men) after more than 25 yrs of social service have yet failed to convince the village mother to change their outlook. OK. Its only when they fail to convince them..they take the babies(and save their lives) and get them to the orphanage.
I am not keen to read a link thats pasted above..by someone. The reason I posted a UNICEF link deliberately...coz thats not a women organization hoping that men here wont take offense to it and call it biased.
But alas...
Byw...Jinesh,I read your last message that we exchanged. Glad you took my suggestion sportingly too ..and point is well made.. That ends it here.
Cheers to you too.
Regards
How many girls can work as a waiter, shoe polisher, drainage cleaner, mine worker, construction worker, drivers, etc (the list goes on) ? I don't think you are interested in actual discussion, you seem to be persistent in trying to prove your stupidity. Can a girl do the above job which requires a lot of physical strength ? Its not about 'rights' understood kid, its about job requirements. You are not going to give a job to somebody who can't do it. You are living in a city, born in a well-to-do family, that is why you have miserably failed to understand how it is to live in poverty. What idiotic recommendation you are giving ? To give the child away to an orphanage as if you are donating Millions of funds every year to these Orphan houses. I have never heard such a ridiculous advice in my whole life. You are saying female foeticide is a gender issue. Then why don't you provide free steriods to all girl child so that they can become as physically strong as men so that they can do hard labour jobs ? Think and then write, stupid.
Kavita
Kavita or who...
Sad people have to change their identifications only to proove a point...
Btw...."how many boys can be drivers drainage cleaner, mine worker, construction worker?" Men do these jobs..not boys or children for that matter. Its so obvious ur a male talking pointlessly.
We men in our true identity like rebel, jinesh, bharati here can take care by replying to be above comments openly. So dont bother about changing ur name. I hate it when my fellow-brothers here change their names / gender to pull someone down.
This is the reason why these bloody real women take advantage of our stupid moves...they think we hide behind women to prove our point by taking their help. Why do you do that?
Deepak M
Deepak M
Which city are you living in ? Or maybe you are blind. Open your eyes and you will see how many young boys are working. Go to some construction site and you will find so many young boys working. Who is selling newspapers on the streets, who is making tea at the road stalls, who is cleaning the gutters...young boys ranging from 12-25 years. Besides, I have read everybody's comments here, I don't think that jinesh, bharati and rebel would be changing their identity to discuss this matter. Keep your investigative mentality to your self because you are wrong. I agree with you that women will never ever support a man, but there are few handful of women in the country that would consider justice more than gender. The one who is arguing over female foeticide claiming to be a gender issue, she is a feminist and probably a lesbian who not only hate men sexually but also psychologically too. She seems to be desperatly seeking a female partner.
Ahmed
that rebel should write something here. he seem to mentally torture that anonymous girl who is talking about gender and rights. where the hell is that rebel, i kinda liked his writing stuff. even she seems scared of rebel ahhahhhaaa......
chirag
Jinesh is right. I am married for the last 6 years with one daughter. My wife has slapped me a number of times in front of my daughter. I had to control myself because I care about my daughter and don't want her to see any violence at home. Moreover, the society will never believe that my wife slaps me so I have to keep quiet and suffer. If the law does not provide any provision to protect us, then what's the guarantee that a wife will stop beating her husband ? What is stopping them to make changes in the law ? I know that many men are beaten up at home but rarely do they come forward. Indian law must change or else divorce cases will increase and only men will suffer and women will enjoy adultery.
Manish
Meri biwi ne bhi mujhe laafa maara tha kai baar, lekin mai nahi maar sakta kyon ki woh ek aurat hai. phir aurat kyon mard ko maar sakti hai?
aaj kal ki aurat ko respect nahi karna chahiye. aurat badi chaalu ho gayi hai. lekin yeh saalaa government, mard logo ki life kharab kar rahe hai.
abhi bahut saare mard log abhi aage aane chahiye aur yeh aurato ki dadagiri ka jawaab dena chahiye. bahut ho gaya aurat log ki dadagiri.
Satish
Hey!!! once again misinterpretations. Either you are confused or hell bent to misinterpret.
We do not claim female as a weaker sex, it is the villager parents who "cleverly represent" it that way. And I am not going to respond to you advocating for such murderer parents anymore. I reiterate, There are parents who have raised their daughters too in villages. It is only clever branding of the femilitants to encash on acts of such cruel and cunning parents. The story that you are giving now requires proofs in terms of which village and which parents.
Trivia: And the research says Male Foeticides are more weaker than Female Foeticides. Read today's Times of India.
Still we are burdened as Stronger sex and even after divorce/ separation the girl gets the alimony and keeps on self earning in black (by tuitions and other hard cash earning jobs) and also enjoys the parasitehood of alimony. Kyu waha par shaan se nahi jiti, Kahe ko bechari ban ke haath felati hai?
Agreed if the marriage lasted for a longer period where she was dedicated to the house and had got muck at the end, she must get compensation. But if the marriage lasted for months, no kids nothing then why make a sorry state of the whole thing. Try and get the essence of my point do not search loop holes.
I have high regards for women who are in my group who have not claimed a single rupee from their cruel husbands. Rather have been practical in life and gone ahead. You may interact with them too. We share the same frequency of supporting honest people irrespective of genders.
Thanks on one thing, you have correctly approved this forum that talks of equal rights. Unlike those feminist who have made a abla of women, that status that they talk about defies all your comments on potential that women have.
That ends here from me too as of now.
Thanks and Cheers Once again.
Further we are fighting against the law that punishes the innocent by default and that is gender biased.
We are against cruelty of any kinds. We approve the facility of divorce under section 13b of mutual consent due to mismatch of tempraments that impossible to reconcile.
Then why saddistically blackmail with lies and 498a. Just for money? Right.
Why make a case 4 of the whole thing (Read Sita Surpanakha)?
To Jinesh and all commentors
Why don't you think that this episode of a wife beating her husband and then going scot free will not act as a motivator for other women ?
Any woman/wife will begin to think like this, "hey, even when this man showed on video how his wife tortures him, the law nor the society could punish that woman, why don't we women also start torturing our husband because he will have nowhere to go, he will have no legal protection also".
This should not be considered an exceptional incident. Immediately a law must be made to protect men otherwise, these women will torture each and every men and there would be none who could protect that man. Shame on our Indian law who considers women above justice.
Pankaj
one of the SIF losers again tried posting a comment on my blog in an unrelated post....obviously it was posted at an unrelated blog post...no one can accuse you guys of being intelligent ...correct...
i rejected it but i am putting it here that your issue does not interest me in the least...
you guys might not have a life other then this...
i do...
so stay away from my blog
and the guy was called deepak...
another alias for you jinesh?
jinesh is a nice name...why do you have to use someone else's name?
Dear Silbil,
I am sorry for all this. But I am not doing it. If I have to comment I would log in in my username and do it. It is definately not someone from my group. You can check the IP address with sitemeter. And may be we can find out.
Someone else is doing it on other blogs too. With my name and my article link. I am sending P M's to all those, who are getting back to me.
The worst part my ideas are been distorted and misrepresented.
Just ignore it.
I, anyways do not frequent on your blog. And I assure since you do not want, I won't.
Frankly, It is anyways of no interest to me too.
God Bless You.
Jinesh.
hi Jinesh
Got both your replies...the one on mail and also the one you left as a comment.
thanks for making it clear
it makes me very sad that some of the men in your blog try to weaken their own and the position of genuine victims by being such irresponsible buggers
now i moderate my comments so i don't have the comment that this deepak fellow left but the jerk has been following my blog so has posted the same comment at a frien's post (this friend is not even involved in the gender war he just posts poems on his blog) so you can access it there...
www.chupkese.blogspot.com
the 2nd post there ek geet it is called
and ya do read the blog otherwise too..lovely poems ...will refresh your mind...
i will figure out the IP address and mail it to you.
Godspeed.
Silbil
In the future, do not to troll my website for such rubbish.
It is very important to understadn waht do you mean by a women, if the same is not clear such legal terrorism will continue.
Recently i asked to NCW chair person in our last meeting, if you fell husabnd beat thier wife, hang them immediately( but please give the evidence).
But they are not ready with that proposal also, as they want only money...
Here the problem and Indian men are more responsible for that.
check this a must read news which had been hided by all media and teaching the Kiss activity of Rakhi..
Seven Female Doctor Suspended for Killing the Child.
Which one was more important?
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