Ab kahan bell bajaou?

Which door do we Knock?: Indian Husbands

When the bell bajao campaign hit the screens most of the males who had come for counseling informed me that they too knocked the door of the neighbors when their wives harassed them. In some cases Hubby and his parents were rescued by neighbors from a violent and abusive Surpanakha disguised as Chandi / Sita who would only respect her illogical stubbornness. But in courts these innocents Sr Citizens and their family are treated as criminals and the legal terrorists are funded by state and by her perpetual ATM hubby.

Still some husbands ignorantly trust courts as a recourse (actually so called) for relief till they realize that even courts are helpless. Husbands do a Bell Bajao at the courts in other words they knock the doors of courts hoping (under the false impression) that courts can grant divorce to Indian Husbands easily in India. Alas, Even Judges believe that Divorce by male is anti traditional and the same decision by female is pro modern and it reflects in the hearings and then in judgements.

And worst would be when his fate meets the bench of Katjuji and Vermaji. This bench defied the 5th habit of Stephan Covey of “Seek first to understand and then being understood” and that is ‘if I can see through my specs your vision numbers are irrelevant even you should be able and should see only through my specs.' The bench proved it by saying "Hum sab bhogi hai (we are all sufferers)." And also “The bench further said that a husband has to accept the suggestion of a wife irrespective of the fact whether it is sensible or not.” "If your wife asks you to put your face that side, put it that side. If she says, put it this side, then put it this side. Otherwise you will face trouble. (Are they suggesting legal terrorism?) Link to this news

I once again mention that the spouse on receiving end is ready to barter anything for peace and freedom instead of putting conditions, be it man (mostly) or woman (women even with a legal advantage wants to get rid, if she is really abused). Almost all harassed guys have a mindset for their other halves and that is “What will you take to help me get rid of you?” Some fight for the whole life and reach the Supreme Court.

One such case reached SC after a long battle of anticipating freedom from the clutches of an abusive wife who has abused and charged the husband to be in all sorts of crimes. The retired Air Force officer (husband) offered Rs. 10,00,000 (Rupees One Million) to his wife as a one time settlement of the dispute in the “eyes” of the court. To which the ostensibly biased court advised the Jew to obey the domestic and legal Hitler. Another Henpecked approach by the court who arguably ignored the charges by the husband and the cruelty on him. This is not for the first time that the courts are suggesting hubbies to be henpecked or handcuffed. Some days back another 17 yr old case was featured in TOI against the husband who wanted a legal divorce but SC ordered him to take back his wife inspite of all the false charges against him and the pain of lifetime.

Yaar, these are hearings / judgements, they may or may not affect other hearings, they may or may not dictate a precedent, but just imagine series of cases where a husband wants to stay away from an abusive spouse who thinks abusing as her moral right. He is ready to pay her for the nuisance value and mental peace after almost a battle of decade and a half is ordered to compromise beyond his comfort. Just because the wife has a fail safe 498a/DV/Alimony misuse and hubby has no shield.

Where would the husbands go and knock the door???? Who would listen to them?

Bell Bajao!!!! Par kahan? Where?

Shayad Mandir Mein (May be in Temple) Hey Ishwar are you listening?

Are koi hai? (Is anyone there?)
Knock Knock, Ring Ring,

Jinesh Zaveri.